Bday

20-02-25

Happy Birthday, dear sister! 🎉 Congratulations! You’ve managed to survive yet another year without accidentally setting yourself on fire, getting abducted by aliens, or falling into an open manhole while scrolling through your phone. Truly, an achievement worth celebrating!

But let’s be honest—you’re just one year closer to your inevitable doom. Soon, you’ll hit 20, then 30, then 40… and before you know it, your knees will start making weird noises, your metabolism will retire before you do, and you’ll begin saying things like “Back in my day…” while scaring young children with stories of how we once had to "wait for the internet to load."

If things go well, you’ll achieve your dreams, find love, have kids, watch them grow, and maybe even be lucky enough to see your grandkids ruin your peace just like you ruined Mom and Dad’s. But if things go south—well, let’s just say, I’ll try my best to convince people that you didn’t actually mistake a lake for a road and drive straight into it.

No matter what, the truth remains: today, you are officially one year closer to your death. And as your loving sibling, I’d like to take this moment to express my sincere condolences in advance. Who knows? Maybe, by the time you finally kick the bucket, we won’t even be in touch anymore. So, let me say it now—Rest in Peace, future-you. You will be missed… probably.

But hey, for now, enjoy your cake and pretend like none of this is happening. Happy Birthday! 🎂🎈